Tuesday, August 12, 2014
Ron left this morning, just as he does every morning, so I am assuming that he thinks all this has blown over. He has another think coming. 'This' is some serious stuff, and we will talk about it.
When I woke up, I had a hard time talking myself into actually getting up and doing stuff around here today, but I finally did because it needed done, and I am here to do it. I got the dishes all put away, and got some laundry started, the first load being towels and other flat things.
I kept at my work all day long, between bouts of lying down and playing on the pute, as I do every other day. Only difference being, today I kept bursting into tears, just thinking about yesterday and what may happen today when Ron gets home. He didn't understand what I was trying to tell him yesterday, so why was I thinking he was going to understand anything I was going to say to him today? Oh, I was not looking forward to this at all.
I zapped two hot dogs for my lunch, and just kept going. That's all I could do. I had finished the second load of laundry - regular clothes - and carried the basket into the bedroom so that I could actually put the clothes away, which is unusual for me.
Finally, Ron got home about 5:30. I was busy hanging clothes in the bedroom, and he came in there and kissed me, and then commented, "Oh, I guess you're still mad at me." (I told you he thought it was all over!) I shot him a glare (aka a dirty look) and told him, "I don't want to be married to my father. Let me know when you turn back into my Ron." and just kept hanging clothes. He walked out of the room and came out to the living room. I came out here when I was done and sat at my desk. Eventually, he said that he "didn't want to be like your dad, but I don't know what to do." I told him, once again, for starters, that when someone tells him something (about something coming up) say something besides "can't, can't, can't." Say, "Wow!" or "Sounds like fun!" or something, and then start the worrying. He said, once again, about being the only one working, or bringing in money, and I told him that NO ONE is questioning that. We all know that very well, and that part is not the problem, the problem is his negative attitude when something is brought up. I reminded him that he has no part - nothing to say about the money once he brings it home, and if he isn't happy with the job I'm doing, paying the bills and shopping and all that, he can take it over and see if he can do better. If he thinks he can, I will gladly show him the books and step back and let him.
He did say, then, that, no - I am doing a fine job and getting things done. He's just worried about losing the house. I asked him, "Why? I have told you and told you and told you that we have been only one month behind in the mortgage, and this past week, I got it paid up, which is why our money is extremely tight this week. Don't you believe me when I tell you these things? Do you really think I'm that money-stupid?" He said, again, that I am doing a good job with paying the bills, and I am just so confused now - what is he so worried about then?
But before we can continue, Josh and Chelle came in. Josh had stopped, on his way home from work, at my friend Bert's to pick up some green beans for us. I don't know how Chelle ended up with him, but that's not my concern. The beans are from the produce man and are ones that he couldn't or didn't sell, and must be picked through and sorted. They are not pretty. I put them to soak in cold water with salt & vinegar, so I can sort them later. I have to leave to go to my TOPS meeting, too.
At the meeting, I weigh in, and I have lost a little over a pound. 1.2 to be exact. Hooray! After gaining 4 pounds last week, that is good news. I ended up being Loser of the Week, too, which was a surprise. Evidently, everyone else had a pretty bad week. I come home, and there is no supper waiting, cooking, or anything, and Ron has not even taken his shower yet. Great.
I go get cheese weenies out of the freezer and put them on for our supper, and that was that. When I ate mine, I had a dozen or so jelly beans for dessert, but that was it for food.
When I put my food in MFP, it hollered at me, so I added a snack of popcorn & milk, which I will have when I go to bed, because I sure don't want a sugar low in the middle of the night. Blah.
Hopefully, Ron and I can talk a little bit more. Hopefully.
No comments:
Post a Comment